Sunday, January 07, 2007

The Dallas Cowboys suck but then you already knew it

It wasn't just that the Dallas Cowboys lost today against the Seattle Seahawks in a wild-card playoff. It wasn't that they lost inside the final two minutes of the game due to a fumbled field goal snap that would otherwise have given them a victory. What was so special about this loss was that Terrell Owens had a mediocre 2 receptions for 26 yards. Terrell Owens, as you know, was responsible for the massive chutyagiri that happened last year which fucked up the Philadelphia Eagles 2005 season. And what was even more enjoyable was Terrell Owens coming forth in the post-game press conference and talking about returning to Dallas next year and moving forward and hello Owens, my son, let me tell you a story. There was a little boy who grew up to be Terrell Owens and he played for the Philadelphia Eagles for a year and then he fucked them over and went to Dallas and played for the Dallas Cowboys for a year and then he was canned. And they all lived happily ever after. My God, how I love that story.

Although I did feel bad for Dallas quarterback Tony Romo who fumbled the snap. Regardless of how passionately I hate the cowboys, I do have a soft spot for Romo. And he was so very humble during the press conference and took all responsibility for the loss and he cried and so sweet were his tears from an Eagles perspective but if you were to look at him as a human being, you had to feel some sympathy.

Tomorrow the Philadelphia Eagles play the New York Giants in a wild-card playoff. Hopefully tomorrow will bring as much joy and ejaculation to Philadelphia sports fans as today did. I will be in Chickie's and Pete's, the same place that is so friendly to messy-eaters and I will be sporting a brand new Eagles jersey. This jersey has some amazing winning properties, as proved by today's Cowboys loss.

Fly Eagles Fly
On the road to victory
Fly Eagles Fly
Score a touchdown one two three
Hit 'em low
Hit 'em high
And we'll watch our Eagles fly
Fly Eagles Fly
On the road to victory

E A G L E S Eagles

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

If there is a team that I hate more than the Cowboys, its the Giants. I will root for the Eagles to kick their ass today.

Tony Romo's missed snap brought to memory Chetan Sharma's last ball full toss to Javed Miandad.

Sunil said...

I just moved from Seattle to Dallas. Do I cry or laugh?

Anonymous said...

It was a wild game. I almost lost hope, and then a whole lot of things started happening. Safety, touchdown, missed two points, stopping the first down, muffed field goal, short of first down and touchdown. I am sure I will remember the sequence for a long time.

It was extra sweet that TO sucked ass. Good luck to Philly. Though it will help Seattle if the Giants win!

-naveen.

gawker said...

Bongo : Thanks, it was a great victory. Eli is such a fraud. Yeah, its funny how everyone in India including me still remembers that sixer. It's probably one of the most painful memories for our generation. In our deathbed we will still be replaying that incident as we are gasping for breath.

sunil : You should laugh. Even though you've moved, keep Dallas at a safe distance. Don't let it inside your soul.

naveen : Yeah, it was a great game. Whats funny is the same thing happened in the Cincinnati-Denver game as well just a week ago. Usually no one screws up the field goal hold.

Seattle should do well in Chicago next week. I think Chicago is a fraud just like Eli.

Anonymous said...

The Cowboys will make the playoffs in 07/08.