Monday, October 31, 2005

Multiculturalism in action

I think the process of multiculturization of America is complete. And I say this based on the following observation. In America, the act of flashing a high beam on the road used to mean only one thing. That you were allowing the person opposite you the courtesy of safe passage. In India, the same flashing of a high beam meant the opposite. That you were commanding the other guy to allow you safe passage or you would fucking run into his car regardless.

So nowadays, with the number of Indians increasing in the US, bringing with them a whole lot of cultural baggage and the Indian interpretation of high beam flashing, Americans get kind of confused when someone flashes a high beam at them. They hesitate. Especially when they notice you are an Indian. And then they allow you to go first. Because I think too many Indians have rammed into too many Americans after having flashed high beams at them. And that is a pity. Communication breakdowns are always a pity.

But then, it is also a sign of the multiculturalization of America, which is a great thing.

Tit for tat

My neighbour is learning to parallel park her car between my car and another neighbour's vehicle. Maybe when it's time, I should toilet train my first born in her apartment.


This is my new blog. The next few paragraphs will explain in detail the story and my motivation behind this blog.

Concept-wise, this is an old blog. An old, old blog. It has been flogged to death. I will, however, attempt to revive this blog, only to reflog it to death. This will be a blog that will be an outlet for me to perambulate, meander and digress. The contents of this blog will be mostly superficial, irrelevant observations regarding mundane occurrences in life. As far as possible, I will attempt to sift through the pile of events befalling me in my day to day existence and try to retrieve those that exhibit a mundanity that is somewhat less pronounced than others. For instance, if I decide to write about brushing teeth, it will be about that instance, when, during the act of brushing, the toothbrush grew wings and escaped in flight, with me running in pursuit. Or if the simple act of taking a shower begs to be written about, then it will be done only if I discover prehistoric human remains within the hidden depths of my bar of soap.

Posts on this blog will usually be minuscule in size, ranging from a single word, for example "Fuck", to a few sentences, for example, "Fuck. I cut my fingers. I was chopping onions", depending on the verbosity of the mood I find myself in. Prepare to be underwhelmed by the lack of blazing insight you will experience while perusing through the writing on this blog.

I am a frustrated cook. I will vent the cause of my frustrations on this blog. I will sometimes, very seldomly, be happy with the product of my cooking conquests and in case such a hard-to-imagine scenario comes to pass, I will recreate the process of my satisfaction in detail. Readers would do well to try it themselves, although I take no responsibility for individual results. Also, if the result of your cookery sparks off any anatomical dysfunctioning, you probably did not follow my recipe to the book.

This blog will not contain any erudite reflections on the numerous political, religious or economic problems currently afflicting the world. Social commentary will be non-existent. Political viewpoints might make infrequent appearances, but only as a lever to bolster non-political points to be made. Gratuitous Bush-bashing will seldom be indulged in, except maybe in a passing reference, like for example I do something stupid and I say to myself, goddamn, why the fuck is George Bush so fucking stupid? That is one example of how a political viewpoint might make an inadvertant appearance.

And so, let me without further ado, on this fine note and with a swift kick on it's buttocks, launch this blog off into the great wide open spaces of the blogosphere. Hold tight, and stay dry people, it's going to be a bumpy ride.

But before we end this post, let me explain the cryptic remark made in my previous post. There was a commercial for a Halloween Fright Ride playing on the television and the ghost that was supposed to be scaring people was a big black guy in make-up, hanging around the place looking pretty bored with the proceedings. The reason I had to comment on such a thing was because blogger would not let me view my blog unless it contained at least one post. And now that's explained, on with it.

Friday, October 28, 2005


Never seen such a bored-looking ghost in my life.