Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Actual things

Actual things I've said :

To CEO of the last company I worked for in his house on Turkey Hill road : "So, like, are we on a hill right now?"

To a cop who pulled me over doing 75 in a 45 mph zone : "Officer, I was speeding because I wanted to catch the light before it turned red."

Actual things I've seen on the news :

NBC news teaser : "A body was found in a local cemetery. Police are still investigating."

ABC news teaser : "In breaking news, a local woman gave birth on the Vine Street Expressway. Our camera crew went behind the scenes to investigate."


Anonymous said...

75 in 45 eh? beats my 60 in 30, or does it?

Anonymous said...

"Officer, I was speeding because I wanted to catch the light before it turned red."

Did he buy it ?

I bet he would have if you were a blonde (and a member of the opposite sex).

Local news teasers (and the news itself) are the funniest things on TV other than Stewardt/Colbert.

gawker said...

He didn't buy it. In fact, he got so pissed that he gave my friend in the backseat who was whispering at me to shut the hell up a ticket for not wearing a seatbelt. Never seen anyone get a ticket for not wearing a seatbelt in a backseat before or after that episode.

RobRoy said...

I thought the driver got the ticket for people not wearing a seatbelt. Or maybe that's only in the magical land of Pennsylvania.

gawker said...

robroy : yes it must be the magic of pennsylvania. but wait this happened in massachusetts. They are crazy people up there anyways.

nocturne : Goddamnit. yes i believe i missed a golden opportunity to sic the hell out of this place.