Each day at work, I see my trashcan has moved a bit closer to the door of my cubicle than it was the previous day. I think somebody is trying to steal it an inch at a time. I noticed because lately, I haven't been having as much success with my paperball 3-point dunks. And they say one gets better with practice and human growth hormones.
I suspect it's John. John with all those banana skins and candy wrappers lying around on his desk. How many bananas does one eat in a day? Should have noticed it at the time. Although I'm not exactly sure what his exit strategy is. How it's gonna work when he makes the trashcan disappear entirely. Theoretically, it might be possible not to notice something move an inch a day but surely one would notice it's total disappearance?
Right now I'm toying with the thief. Pretending I suspect nothing and letting the charade continue. But just when the trashcan is almost out the door, I'm gonna bring it back in. All the way in. Make him wish he could get back all those wasted minutes of his life. Gonna make him realize crime don't pay. Gonna get John back on the straight and narrow.
5 comments:
or they might be moving your cubicle... or your cubicle might be evolving into a bigger better cubicle...
-S
If John was as smart and devious as me, he wouldn't steal your trash can. He will drop all his trash in your trash can when you are not around, so that your cube stinks and not his.
S : I don't think my cubicle is growing. If anything, it's growing smaller. Or maybe it's me who is growing larger. Too many possibilities.
lonestar : Nah, John knows I hate people using my trashcan. Especially to throw banana skins or used diapers.
Somebody stole my trash can at work and just left me the recycling bin. So now I accumulate trash on my desk and then carry it to the receptacle down the hall. I asked facilities for a new one and the said that trash cans are a coveted item and to appropriate one on my own.
Yes, trash cans are indeed precious. The best part about heaven? Unlimited trash cans, staplers and paper clips.
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